Who's the 3rd FAIR-est Frau of them all?

So, last week marked the beginning of the DuQuoin State Fair, which is the down-state version of the Illinois State Fair. Since I am not such a fan of deep-fried anything, livestock, and the mouth-breathing masses of fair-goers, this event would normally hold little appeal for me. However, the fair does have one event that I find irresistible; the Mystery Sack Cooking Contest.

It is as it sounds. Each contestant shows up with an electric skillet, utensils, and three 'spices or condiments of their choice.' You are handed a bag o' groceries chosen by the hosts of the contest. You have one hour to cook, name, and present to the judges a dish using at least some of all of the ingredients in the bag. Using your own ingredients is optional. After waffling all day about what to bring, I decided on my three ingredients: cream, butter, and dijon mustard (thanks to all of the facebook friend Fraus for the suggestions.) The first year, I showed up having forgotten that you often need things like mixing bowls to prepare a meal. This year, I brought half of my kitchen, just to be sure. This Frau was prepared for anything...until I got my bag o groceries. This year the bag contained:

polish smoked sausage
one new potato
a cup of water
about 1/2 c of oil
salt & pepper
a baggie of shredded cheese
a baggie of tortilla chips (emcee kept pronouncing the hard-L...Tor-tiLL-a)
an orange
a red bell pepper
1/4 head of cabbage
a can of beenie weenies
and 5 oreos

I said an 'F' word and trust me, it wasn't 'Frau.' But with only an hour, you can't cry over dropped F-bombs. I set to work steaming lengthwise slices of new potato while I chopped and thought. Hard.

I hate oreos and beenie weenies. Gross. What the hell am I supposed to do with that?

But as it turned out, I am a pretty clever Frau, in the kitchen, anyway. After my potato was steamed I proceeded to:

Melt butter and scraped-out insides of oreos to create a sweet syrup-set aside.

Sauteed bell pepper and sausage. Smashed beenie weenies to a paste. Added potato and cream. Mixed in small amount of beenie-weenie paste (Asian chefs everywhere cringe) which helped to thicken. Topped with cheese and crushed Tor-tiLL-as, baked in the skillet until done. Meanwhile, I sliced the cabbage razor thin, tossed with a citrus vinaigrette of orange juice, oil, and dijon mustard. Remaining cream was whipped to stiff peaks, and oreo syrup and crushed cookies were mixed in. I presented 'Porky's Skillet Bake, Citrus Dijon Slaw, and Oreo Cookie Cloud' to the judges.

I won third place and 20 bucks. Not bad for haute cuisine on the fly, including beenie weenies. Gross.